Crossroads

Some maps no longer work for where I am going.

In our new city I have been very dependent on Siri’s voice for driving directions. There is a mall the kids like, and both times I have driven there I got turned around as I drove past the entrance. New construction radically transformed a nearby overpass and interchange, but Siri and Google maps haven’t received the update. The former exit no longer exists, and the best exit doesn’t show up on the map.

New seasons of life are great, if for no other reason than I was saved for transformation and shedding the old for the new. But new seasons require letting go of old pathways, thoughts, and motives.

Getting to joy and meaning and fulfillment —  I’ve learned the hard way that the old, pre-Jesus roads don’t get me there.

The two times I got lost I was actually near enough to see the mall as I drove down the expressway. That feeling of “there it is” quickly gave way to “there it went.” This added to my frustration, punctuating what I wanted but couldn’t reach. When I am unable to arrive at hoped-for destinations because I continued riding old habits, I think it’s all-the-more frustrating when I can see freedom or love or purpose but can’t find a way to arrive there.

I stand at this crossroads, recognizing my need to learn from pathways taken in the past, and also giving myself permission to let go of them. Maybe they were good back in the day, but those maps no longer work for where I am going.